The following is satirical, meaning it is fake and should not be taken seriously.


Al Avila (Getty Images)
Tigers GM Al Avila (Getty Images)
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Detroit Tigers general manager Al Avila on Tuesday said the franchise needs "to get younger, leaner," and that "this organization has been working way above its means, as far as payroll for many, many years... It would be foolish to continue on that trend."

Avila said no player on the roster is exempt from potential trade negotiations, noting he would even consider offers for Detroit's young prospects.

Then on Wednesday, the Tigers announced the first annual Al Avila Detroit Tigers Firesale as part of its effort to trim payroll and take the first step into the future of the club.

The Tigers also released the following commercial in the 25 Major League Baseball markets other than Detroit, ostensibly inviting their counterparts to inquire about their assets.


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